Everyone believes you should know what to do and what to say in a relationship. Be it as friends, lovers, siblings or co workers.
Some things should just not be said and some, not done either.
But how do you know where these lines are?
We all know or have at least heard the saying that "your friends' ex is a no go area for you", talkless of your siblings'. Who came up with this rule?
Understood, you shouldn't pick up someone else's reminants but what if the situations were different? Maybe she hurt him, didn't appreciate him or just doesn't think he's right for her, but in your case, he's a perfect match. That aside, hes still the ex, if we decide to cast a blind eye on the reasons for their break up.
Notice the keyword being "ex" not current. So I'm still trying to understand why this particular rule applies. Cos a friend recently got into trouble for talking to her friends ex boyfriend. By talking, she means skype conversations. I've said to myself that it's wrong for her to do so, but I can't place a finger on one particular reason why. It's just something that's not done. Now she claims there's nothing between her and her friend's ex, they are just friends, but now her friend has gone stark raving mad saying she just shouldn't have. Now my question is why ?
Boundaries as friends. Should there be things that you should and shouldn't say to a "friend"? It's a common belief that you should be able to say anything to your close friends. You should be able to put them straight when they seem to be heading the wrong way, but some don't seem to want to hear the truth, they just believe it shouldn't be said. They come to you for corroboration, and as the friend you have to give it. Now this isn't done.
I think things that shouldn't be said revolve around matters thar probably hurt your friend, everytime they are reminded about it or as with the case above, the ex says something contrary to what your friend has said and you'd rather not confront her about it cos maybe you take her word over his and won't need to confirm anything with her.
Am I right? Or I seem to be getting these rules wrong? If so then where's the thin line?
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